The Baby Shouter

The time is approaching. Soon there will be another Lawrence added to our family. Marley Elijah (or maybe William, or perhaps David, possibly Jacob...the middle name is a little up in the air), is due in mid-May.

Harper has known about the imminent arrival for a long time now and she seems to be adjusting well. Of course, it's all theoretical right now and who knows how she'll react when we actually bring home her little brother. But for now she's pretty open to the concept.

For months now, when we ask her where the baby is she's been pointing to McCall's belly. But recently she started taking it to a whole new level. Now she will go over to McCall and shout at her belly button, "Hello, baby Marley!" at the top of her lungs. It's very cute and only slightly disruptive to our neighbors.

A Royal Birthday Party

Daycare is kind of the common denominator of society. Regardless of where you are on the scale, chances are you need to have your kid in some sort of childcare program so you can do all the things that you can't do while constantly running after a toddler.

This creates a pretty interesting phenomenon wherein people from all walks of life mix together without really knowing it. I mean, the average conversation I have with my fellow daycare parents is something along the lines of, "Hi, how are you?", followed by pleasant response.

However, our kids are spending eight hours a day together so they become best friends. This was how we came to be invited to a very impressive birthday party. One of Harper's classmates, Estella, was celebrating her second birthday and all the kids from her daycare received special invitations in the shape of a crown. The invitation specifically said, "Royal Attire Requested". Unfortunately, Harper went as a little piggie on Halloween so we had to go out and buy a princess costume. Luckily we live in LA and the best costume shop on the planet is right up in Hollywood and is open year round.

I wanted to get a traditional pink princess costume. McCall in her need to be "different", wanted to dress Harper (our DAUGHTER) as a knight. A knight! I reminded her that Harper was born sans penis, and she said, "You know, like Joan of Arc." I reminded McCall that Joan of Arc was likely schizophrenic and was definitely burned at the stake!

We compromised and purchased a traditional pink princess costume.


Harper and her friend, Estella.

We also decided that we'd have a little fun with it all and bought a crown and sceptor for me, and a tiara for McCall. I decided to have a little more fun and threw on my bathrobe and pulled up some dress socks to look a little more kingly.

We knew that Estella lived in the Hollywood Hills so we left plenty of time to deal with traffic, winding hilly roads, and the possibility of getting lost (even with a navigation system those roads can be tricky). As it turns out we were the first guests to arrive.


A cake fit for a princess!

At first, I thought I had the wrong address. But all the balloons suggested otherwise. You see, the house was not what you expect for a couple and their two year old daughter. It was more along the lines of say...Tony Montana. This is by no means an indictment of Estella's parents. They are, in fact, wonderful, generous, caring people. It's just to say, this place was HUGE!


Princess Harper and King Daddy

We showed up at the same time as Cinderella. That's right, Estella's parents hired a woman in full Cinderella costume to provide entertainment for the kiddos. When we entered the home we had to walk up three flights of stairs to get to the floor where the party was going to take place. Of course we could have taken the elevator but I wanted the exercise.


Cinderella made balloon animals, did face paint, pedicures, a magic show and washed our car. Okay, I made up the bit about the balloon animals.

There were decorations everywhere, including huge Fat Head-style wall prints of all the Disney princesses. The party was totally catered with delicious chicken penne, calamari, and mussels in paella.

The house overlooks Los Angeles and has an amazing view of the Hollywood sign from nearly the same elevation. It was a really spectacular setting.

Lots more people showed up to the party and while several little ones had various costumes on, I was the only adult wearing a bathrobe and crown. Go figure. But we had a great time and were so appreciative of Estella's parents going out of their way to make a truly magical evening for all the kids.

Run, Daddy, Run!

Marriage and fatherhood are life altering events. For me they also happened to be body altering as I have been hovering around 200 lbs. since about the time Harper was born. I knew my lifestyle was demanding a change. I had little energy, was sluggish in the mornings, snacked a lot and generally was just not very fit. In short, I was an average American dad.

Then, last November (or so) a friend of mine challenged me to change the way I ate and start exercising. I was getting pretty tired of seeing my gut every time I got of the shower. Plus I had all these great t-shirts I couldn't wear anymore because I was too heavy.

Since that time I've been eating much better by cutting out most of my fast food intake, cutting back most of my soda intake, and getting much more regular exercise. I'm down about 15 lbs. and have been running around my neighborhood. However, I wanted to see if I can run around my neighborhood faster than other people. But since that was too difficult to organize, I decided I would participate in organized events.

So in January I ran in my first race, the Miracle Mile 5K. Unfortunately, because most things I do are poorly planned the first time (no offense, Harper), we forgot the camera. Not that it would have mattered anyway. Since I had never run a race before, I had no idea how long it would take me so I conservatively estimated for McCall that I would be about 45 minutes. Which is why she and Harper were eating breakfast in a nearby diner when I crossed the finish line at 29:31.

Yesterday, I ran in the 30th Annual Firecracker Run, part of the festivities in Chinatown celebrating Chinese new year. This year, 4706, is the year of the rat. The race earns it name because before the start of the 5K they set off 100,000 fire crackers at the starting line! Then we all stood around ready to go while they swept up the debris.

And this time we brought the camera and McCall and Harper waited patiently for me run from Chinatown up to Dodger Stadium and back. I completed the course in 27:52 and McCall got some great shots (see below).


Getting limber, i.e. Trying not to pull a muscle!


Before the race, I found a little beggar girl. Better luck next time, sweetheart.


Harper was crushed to find out that she could not be a Chinese beauty queen because she's too short.


Harper and Daddy before the race.


Racers and spectators look on as 100,000 firecrackers add to LA's air pollution.


The final stretch. That's me on the right but somehow my arms got transplanted onto the guy on the left!

This Sunday I attempt my first 10K (pray for me!!!), and I'll be competing in events at least once a month through June. So keep checking back to see if I can get under the elusive 25 minute mark.

Home Sick

Sickness has befallen my household in a major way. A few weeks ago Harper came down with a bad cold. We suspect that she actually picked up respiratory syncytial virus (RSV) from a friend but we can't be certain. Regardless, there seems to be a lot of nastiness floating around SoCal right now and most of the people we know (especially those with kiddos) are coming down ill.

Due to the extremely responsible yet annoying rules of Harper's daycare, she couldn't go lest she infect the entire infant/toddler population. So we've been home with her for most of the last three weeks. It's kind of a microcosm of last year when she was sick from November to March.

McCall likes to be really cuddly and kissy with Harper so, surprise, surprise, she is also now really sick with infections and coughing and leaky eye and sorts of just bad. Meanwhile, God has blessed me with terrific health. So here I am trying to take care of Harper Jo and McCall while also trying to not run out of steam (or patience).

Harper go so bad that for a while her breathing was pretty labored and her oxygen level was at 83%. So the good people at Kaiser Permanente gave us a nebulizer, which is basically a machine that vaporizes albuterol (a medicine commonly found in asthma inhalers) to assist her breathing. The problem is you have to strap on a mask to breathe it in and we had to give it to her every four hours.


Harper has a future in Scuba diving.

At first Harper hated the treatments. We had to physically restrain her and hold the mask over her face for 15-20 minutes. Eventually we were able to bribe her with TV. We would only allow her to watch one of her favorite shows, Go Baby, while using the nebulizer. It worked brilliantly and now she will ask for the mask whenever she wants to watch the show.

It's just one more way that TV gets an assist when it comes to raising our child.

Christmas Chaos!

Were your holidays like ours? I sincerely hope not for so many reasons I don't want to go into right now. But it wasn't all crying and feelings of hopelessness. We also had a really fun Christmas morning. At least Harper did.

Somewhere along the way Christmas changed for me. I wasn't upset when gifts transitioned from Star Wars figures to Nintendo games. That was actually pretty cool. But then I started getting "grown up" gifts. Dress shirts, organizers, desk calendars. You start to get needs instead of wants as you grow older. This is all well and good, I don't want to sound ungrateful. But there's something about being a six year old boy and getting a Jabba the Hut Action Playset that really inspires the imagination.

Harper made out like a bandit this year. I was never an only child, so I never had two parents, two sets of grandparents, and scads of aunts and uncles buying exclusively for me. This was Harper's situation for Christmas 2007. Some highlights:

The first thing Harper opened was her ginormous, overstuffed stocking. Among her favorites, was this Elmo doll.


Perhaps her favorite gift was this baby doll from her Great Grandmother, which came complete with pacifier and sippy cup.

Some for you...


...some for me.

Harper also got some books. I think her reaction below says it all.


Harper's favorite TV show is Teletubbies so we got her the entire collection.

From left: Po, Dipsy, Tinky Winky. Not pictured: Laa-laa

One of the more...unique gifts we received came from Harper's Great Uncle Jeff. It's a stuffed, sleeping dog that breathes. Just put in the batteries, turn it on, and watch it sleep. And breathe. Not overly exciting but with all the electronic doodads and gizmos she got, it was actually a really nice change of pace to have a calm toy that just quietly lays still. Thanks Jeff!

This comatose dog is the only animal in the house that doesn't poop, pee, or puke on the carpets and furniture (including Harper and McCall)!

Thoughts On Discovering We're Pregnant

In case you don't know, McCall is pregnant. She has been for quite a while, actually. So long that we know we're having a boy. But we wanted to be a little more cautious this time around just in case it "didn't take". Anyway, the day we found out she asked me to write down my thoughts. Here they are:

Wow, what a day! This morning we found out McCall is pregnant. She’s been feeling really poorly for the last two weeks. So yesterday she suggested I pick up an early pregnancy test while I was shopping at the grocery store. I know, fellas, I’m living the dream!

So this morning McCall peed on the thing, and the little plus sign showed up. I think it was either trying to be positive, or it was trying to remind us that we were about to be adding a lot. Adding another mouth, adding more dirty diapers, adding debt. Plus sign indeed.

But today also got me thinking. There are a few specific days that really stand out as defining moments in your life. Some may be bad, like the passing of a loved one, the end of a relationship, failure in the big game. But there are also amazing, positive days that change our lives forever. Graduation, promotion, I do.

Obviously, one of the most life changing days we can possibly experience is bringing a baby into the world. But almost equally as impacting is discovering that you’re expecting. In fact, I consider the day before I learned McCall was pregnant with Harper the last worry free day of my life.

So it’s a good thing I’d already given up my Bear Necessities attitude this morning when McCall took the pregnancy test. Actually, I should more accurately say, when she so totally failed the pregnancy test.

And it’s funny because I bought the cheapest test I could find and then we went to Kaiser Permanente and the most sophisticated medical machines available confirmed the ten dollar plastic stick sitting by the bathroom sink at home. So don’t spend extra bucks for a brand name, they all work the same. Okay, that’s my consumer advocate advice for the month.

Outside

Harper has learned the difference between inside and outside. Unfortunately for us, she only wants to be outside now. As soon as she wakes up in the morning she's asking to go outside.

As soon as we get her home from day care she wants to go outside. When she wakes up in the middle of the night, screaming and crying. She doesn't ask for mommy, doesn't want daddy. She wants to go outside.

Sometimes we'll take her out onto the balcony patio we have. This is not what Harper means when she says, "outside" (or more accurately, "owshide"). Harper has a very specific intent when she requests to be outside.

To her, outside means getting in the swing we have hanging from the tree in our front yard. She loves to go really high in her swing for about ninety seconds. Then she starts frantically signing "all done". As soon as I let her down from the swing, she runs over to our side yard and waits for me to open the gate.

Her first stop is typically the ladybug sandbox. She scoops sand pours it into this funnel thing which spins a paddle wheel as it falls through. Next, she likes to go into her playhouse and stand at the sink. She rubs her hands together and says, "wash". She will also usually ring the playhouse doorbell a few times just to make sure it's still working.

Next she'll go down her little slide once or twice, point to one of the neighborhood cats and say, "shishy", which is how she says "kitty" (as well as "fishy" as when she asks for her favorite Goldfish crackers). She also points to the fish wind chime that hangs outside our neighbor's window by the side yard and says, "shishy" (which is also how she says "kitty").

So at 3:00am, when Harper starts crying to go outside, it's nearly impossible to calm her down. We have to distract her or something and we're usually up anywhere from one to three hours. Harper still has a really hard time sleeping and almost never sleeps undisturbed between midnight and 6:00am.

McCall was lamenting the other day the fact that she taught Harper the difference between inside and outside. But at least this way we know what she wants. It would be so much worse if we just couldn't figure out what she was crying for. At least in theory.